Faith is the Victory

This Sunday at church the communion was led by Jeff Childers. He directed the comments toward the children of the church but indirectly it was also pointed at the adults. He asked the kids to ask their parents or adults around them what the bread and wine meant to them. I found this question to be very intriguing. Yet when the plate was passed to me and I was asked "what does this meant to you?" I stated that truthfully I didn't know. At first I thought that I had copped out of the question, diverging a situation that caused me to open up and share feelings and beliefs. But as I thought about it I realized my statement was the truth.

In my heart I know that the communion is a symbol of our Savior's great love, devotion and sacrifice. That's what we have been told by preachers and through the Bible. But the problem I realized on Sunday was that I don't know what it means to me on a personal level. How do I view Jesus? Do I accept and respect the gift he gave me with the amount of reverence that I should? This realization really shook me up the rest of the service. And the feelings continued in the middle school class as we talked about sitting and listening to God speak to us...an activity I truthfully never exercise.

I realized that my spiritual life has been on a roller coaster. Not the kind that goes up high peaks and down valleys, symbolizing struggles and times of joy, but rather like a roller coaster that spins and loops in every direction causing confusion and disorientation. I don't know where I am with my spiritual life. I don't spend time with God as I should and it bothers me immensly. To those of you reading this blog, whether you know me or not, I would ask that you pray for me and my relationship with God. Thank you.